"I am masculine! I have weights." - Matt
"Be honest, you're not masculine, Matt" - Harly
"I did some sewing last night" - Matt
"I don't think you're helping yourself" - Harly
"Are they married?"
"Yes, I'm pretty sure they are, if they're not, there's far too much kissing going on"
Overheard conversations
"Aww, I love you" - Guy
"I know" - Girl
"And... do you love me?" - Guy
"I said it earlier." - Girl
In the kitchenware section of IKEA
"OH LOOK, IT'S THERE!" - Guy 1
"Shh!" - Guy 2
"It's perfect!" - Guy 1
"It's just a tray, Stuart" - Guy 3
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
Sunday, October 16, 2011
Ten second songs
These are a few 'ten second songs' taken from Alessandra Rizzotti's blog, not quite sure why I came across it, I think it was a link from Facebook. Anyway, so I read it and picked out a few that I like. They're based on e-mails from her mother.
‘Sweaters’
Sweaters are warm/But not as warm as you/You’re as toasty as toast/Like a heater from Home Depot/Gosh, that’s cute that I said that because I love Home Depot, especially their curtains section
‘First Period. Hysterical’
First period/It was a mess/Don’t worry, I’m referring to an educational class I took in seventh grade/I believe it was mathematics
‘Purse’
Purse/I want an expensive one/Like one from Burberry/Don’t you have money to get me one?/Of course not/You have a low paying job/Why didn’t I ever force you to become an engineer?
‘Is The Cat Thing Going to Happen Or Are You Going to Let Me Down?’
Are we getting these cats or are you letting me down?/Don’t make me frown/I’m not in the mood/I just want a cat to squeeze/But not so that it bleeds…(because that would get messy and I’d need some carpet cleaner)
‘Sweaters’
Sweaters are warm/But not as warm as you/You’re as toasty as toast/Like a heater from Home Depot/Gosh, that’s cute that I said that because I love Home Depot, especially their curtains section
‘First Period. Hysterical’
First period/It was a mess/Don’t worry, I’m referring to an educational class I took in seventh grade/I believe it was mathematics
‘Purse’
Purse/I want an expensive one/Like one from Burberry/Don’t you have money to get me one?/Of course not/You have a low paying job/Why didn’t I ever force you to become an engineer?
‘Is The Cat Thing Going to Happen Or Are You Going to Let Me Down?’
Are we getting these cats or are you letting me down?/Don’t make me frown/I’m not in the mood/I just want a cat to squeeze/But not so that it bleeds…(because that would get messy and I’d need some carpet cleaner)
Wednesday, September 07, 2011
Facebook Groups
Just a couple of group names I found on Facebook that quite amused me
Leonardo DiCaprio never died in Titanic - the end scene of Titanic is of him going underwater. The beginning scene of Inception is him waking up on a beach. It's like a movie within a movie.
'I'm a ninja'
'No you're not'
'Did you see me do that?'
'Do what?'
'Exactly.'
Leonardo DiCaprio never died in Titanic - the end scene of Titanic is of him going underwater. The beginning scene of Inception is him waking up on a beach. It's like a movie within a movie.
'I'm a ninja'
'No you're not'
'Did you see me do that?'
'Do what?'
'Exactly.'
Sunday, August 14, 2011
Soul Survivor B 2011
As well as some amazing teaching and great worship there were many entertaining moments of Soul Survivor. I noted a few funny quotes down (mostly from Sanga's talks, so brilliant) which I thought I'd share here...
Talking about girls dreams vs boys dreams
"Batman, Spiderman, Superman - they weren't fantasies for us growing up. They were options." - Sanga
"That night I had enough testosterone in me to jump start a dead elephant. I wasn't Bambi, I was a wild stallion!" - Sanga
Talking about getting old
"Here we visit portaloos. There will come a day when we are a portaloo. At the moment, things work. One day, they'll drop off." - Crofty
"As the great philosopher Edmund Blackadder once said 'Life is like a broken pencil... pointless.'" - - Mike P
"When the bride comes down the aisle, I like to look at the groom, to see if he'll cry. In my church they nearly all cry 'cause they're a bunch of wimps." - Mike P
"You know, when boy meets girl, and girl meets testosterone." - Sanga
"You're going to see some images of Haman now... well that's not Haman, that's a goat." - Sanga
"My grandma used to call me daddy long legs ... I used to want to punch granny in the moustache" - Sanga
Talking about chat up lines
"You might have a Christian guy called Will, who goes up to a girl and says 'My name's Will... God's Will'" - Sanga
Sanga used the first of these quotes below in his talk, and I got distracted surfing the net and found some more I wanted to post, so these are quotes from kids about love and marriage
How would you make your marriage work?
Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a truck. - Ricky, 10
How can a stranger tell if two people are married?
You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids. - Derrick, 8
What would you do on a first date that was turning sour?
I’d run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns. - Craig, 9
When is it okay to kiss someone?
The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn’t want to mess with that. - Curt, 7
What's your best advice about love?
Don't forget your wife's name. That will mess up the love. - Erin, 8
Titles of Love Ballads You Can Sing To Your Loved One:
'I Love Hamburgers, I Like You!' - Eddie, 6
'You Are My Darling Even Though You Also Know My Sister.' - Larry, 8
'I Am In Love With You Most of the Time, But Don't Bother Me When I'm With My Friends.' - Bob, 9
'How Do I Love Thee When You're Always Picking Your Nose?' - Arnold, 10
'Hey, Baby, I Don't Like Girls, But I'm Willing To Forget You Are One!' - Will, 7
Talking about girls dreams vs boys dreams
"Batman, Spiderman, Superman - they weren't fantasies for us growing up. They were options." - Sanga
"That night I had enough testosterone in me to jump start a dead elephant. I wasn't Bambi, I was a wild stallion!" - Sanga
Talking about getting old
"Here we visit portaloos. There will come a day when we are a portaloo. At the moment, things work. One day, they'll drop off." - Crofty
"As the great philosopher Edmund Blackadder once said 'Life is like a broken pencil... pointless.'" - - Mike P
"When the bride comes down the aisle, I like to look at the groom, to see if he'll cry. In my church they nearly all cry 'cause they're a bunch of wimps." - Mike P
"You know, when boy meets girl, and girl meets testosterone." - Sanga
"You're going to see some images of Haman now... well that's not Haman, that's a goat." - Sanga
"My grandma used to call me daddy long legs ... I used to want to punch granny in the moustache" - Sanga
Talking about chat up lines
"You might have a Christian guy called Will, who goes up to a girl and says 'My name's Will... God's Will'" - Sanga
Sanga used the first of these quotes below in his talk, and I got distracted surfing the net and found some more I wanted to post, so these are quotes from kids about love and marriage
How would you make your marriage work?
Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a truck. - Ricky, 10
How can a stranger tell if two people are married?
You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids. - Derrick, 8
What would you do on a first date that was turning sour?
I’d run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns. - Craig, 9
When is it okay to kiss someone?
The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn’t want to mess with that. - Curt, 7
What's your best advice about love?
Don't forget your wife's name. That will mess up the love. - Erin, 8
Titles of Love Ballads You Can Sing To Your Loved One:
'I Love Hamburgers, I Like You!' - Eddie, 6
'You Are My Darling Even Though You Also Know My Sister.' - Larry, 8
'I Am In Love With You Most of the Time, But Don't Bother Me When I'm With My Friends.' - Bob, 9
'How Do I Love Thee When You're Always Picking Your Nose?' - Arnold, 10
'Hey, Baby, I Don't Like Girls, But I'm Willing To Forget You Are One!' - Will, 7
Friday, May 27, 2011
Toilet Door Quotes
There was a street art exhibition on near me recently and one of the things they exhibited was one of the female toilet doors from a local pub which had lots of things written on it, here are a couple of those things:
"I'm celebrating my love for you with a pint of beer and a new tattoo"
"I dream of a world where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned."
"I'm celebrating my love for you with a pint of beer and a new tattoo"
"I dream of a world where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned."
Saturday, February 19, 2011
New Layout
I thought it was time for a change, so finally updated the look of this blog, I like it very much :). I also found how to put the labels in the side bar so it's easier to navigate the quotes!
I may start to do only 1 quote per post (or divide them into the people) so that you don't come up with a massive post when you just wanted to find a quote by one person. I wouldn't go back and change previous posts - except perhaps the 'Random' ones which could do with a bit more specific labelling.
Hope you like it! :)
I may start to do only 1 quote per post (or divide them into the people) so that you don't come up with a massive post when you just wanted to find a quote by one person. I wouldn't go back and change previous posts - except perhaps the 'Random' ones which could do with a bit more specific labelling.
Hope you like it! :)
JLS!
"Oh, I keep forgetting I have knees" - Harly
"It's going to be a pass the parcel drinking game, but you can choose what you drink shots of, so those who don't want to get drunk can just get really hydrated" - Jess
"I thought the cards were in the pack but then I realised it was jelly" - Matt
"I can't count with my mittens on" - Matt
"They look like JLS!" - Jess, really loudly in the street, while pointing at 3 white guys walking past us
I'm guessing she meant the coloured tops, lol, they gave us a really weird look...
"Oh! Add water, not liquid nitrogen!" - Alex
"It's going to be a pass the parcel drinking game, but you can choose what you drink shots of, so those who don't want to get drunk can just get really hydrated" - Jess
"I thought the cards were in the pack but then I realised it was jelly" - Matt
"I can't count with my mittens on" - Matt
"They look like JLS!" - Jess, really loudly in the street, while pointing at 3 white guys walking past us
I'm guessing she meant the coloured tops, lol, they gave us a really weird look...
"Oh! Add water, not liquid nitrogen!" - Alex
Brigands M.C.
"'I'll remember that,' James nodded, as his attention turned back to his crêpe. 'So how did I do?'
'Good,' Martin said. 'It's a bit doughy in the middle because you used too much batter, and when we get a real customer I'd recommend more pleases and thank-yous and slightly less of the threatening to fry their face and shag their ex-girlfriend.'"
- From 'Brigands M.C.' by Robert Muchamore
'Good,' Martin said. 'It's a bit doughy in the middle because you used too much batter, and when we get a real customer I'd recommend more pleases and thank-yous and slightly less of the threatening to fry their face and shag their ex-girlfriend.'"
- From 'Brigands M.C.' by Robert Muchamore
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