College quotes

These are mainly various quotes that I have found scrawled in margins of my pukka pad.

"Are you planning on being your usual self in front of the ofstead people?" - Robert, to Mills

"If I came in and said 'me saw the dog', you'd either think I was regressing or I thought I was Tarzan. I can assure you that neither of those is true" - Jason
"You mean you're not Tarzan?" - Chloe
"Only on weekends" - Jason

Handing out class assessment thingies (I'm not 'officially' in the class)
"You don't get one because you don't exist" - Mills, to Hazel

"Be careful, you don't know where she's been" - Mills, about Max

After a conversation about how our college used to be a boys school - talking about girls:
"Is that why you're so horrible to them, because they don't belong here" - Tony, to Mills

"Is that your artistic skills up on the board?" - Robert
"Yes, that's my earthworm" - Mills
"It's lovely, but why has it got demonic red eyes?" - Robert

"Treat the examiner like they are a half-wit, 50% of the time it'll be true anyway" - Jason
Lol, he was just joking btw - he's an examiner himself!

"Are you here?" - Mills
"Apparently" - Robert
"He didn't die" - Jelena
"Yes, I'm quite pleased, I think I should get a certificate" - Robert

"What are you on, Robert... Valium?" - Mills

And here are some quotes that the class wrote in Mills' thank-you card that was given to him today:

"I hate you a great deal" - Mills, to student

"Oi, you barbie girls, shut up and do some maths!" - Mills

"Robert, keep your bitch on a leash" - Mills, about Max
I vaguely recall this though it is one of the more unusual Mills quotes

'SUA GOWI - Shut Up And Get On With It'
Occasionally written on the board in acronym form...

"Can you help me?" - Student
"Probably not" - Mills

"Jelena's been sent to Kosokov for terrorist training" - Mills

*bop*

Yes, here are some quotes, from about Nov 08 til now. They're roughly in chronological order.

I loved the quote from Peter's T-shirt (one of the Peters in my Sign Language class):
"You probably don't recognise me without my cape"

"If you think about time-travel too much your head explodes, believe me" - Jason
...
"I don't think your head exploded as you've still got one" - Chloe P
"Well, I could be a lobster and have grown a new one" - Jason
Jason is our fantastic English Language teacher - I think we strayed a little from the lesson plan here.

Talking about syntax in active and passive voiced sentences
"Is there any time when the action would move in the sentence?" - Martin
"Only if you're Yoda" - Jason

"My eyes flashed before my life!" - Chloe P

"Do you do much Spanish at home?" - Nathan
"Not really" - Hazel
"I swear you pick it up like... a piece of cheese" - Nathan

"I do skip home, I'm happy at the end of the day" - Jason
He was replying to a student's comment after he used the example sentence 'Singing merrily, I skipped home'

"Holly, if you'd like to go down there and join the gentlemen, and Martin" - Jason
It may be a classic, but it was still entertaining...

"I'm a new man, 21st century, of course I can sew" - Jason

After Carol ran past the front of the car just when Sparkle started driving:
"You wouldn't have had any legs!" - Sparkle, to Carol
"Sure she would, they just wouldn't be very useful" - Helen

"You're like the anti-Kat. You know what you want before you've even seen the menu, but she doesn't even know what she wants after she's eaten it" - Gemmel, to Dan

"That was the highlight of our art lesson" - Nadine
"Peeling glue off your hand?" - ? (friend of Nadine's whose name I don't know)
"Yes" - Nadine